🍞 How To Build The Life You Want To Live

Harness the power of deep work, discipline your monkey mind, & work like your idols.

Jul 03, 2022

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Today’s estimated read time: 4 minutes & 44 seconds.

One Tiny Habit

Less than 5 minutes a day can change your life.

What is your least favorite sound? For me, it’s the ping notification of another email, Teams message, or text hitting my inbox. Historically, I’ve been terrible at blocking out time to just get shit done.

I end the work day with little progress on the stuff that really matters. I’ve kept my head above water but made no real progress towards my bigger goals. I’m still several miles from shore.

About 7 months ago, I found a powerful mechanism for better focus. A speed boat heading right to the shore. That speedboat’s name, Deep Work.

What is Deep Work?

Deep Work is focusing without distraction on a mentally demanding task.

To get into a state of Deep Work, you need 3 things:

A Timer - Set it to 30 minutes (or challenge yourself and do 60 minutes).
A Single Goal - Your most important task for the week, month, or quarter.
Trust - You must trust that the world will not blow up if you don’t respond for 30-60 minutes.

Once the timer is set, you can only work on the task. Your phone is on airplane mode, your email is closed, and all your notifications are silent. I also like to put on a hat & headphones with LoFi beats (or just no lyrics) to make it easier to concentrate.

Similar to training a muscle, it will feel uncomfortable! Your brain will want distractions. You’ll reach for your phone. That’s normal. But over time, you will improve. And, you will knock out those big goals that have been on your to-do list. Start with one, 30-minute block of Deep Work per day. And each following week, go for 5 minutes longer or add one other focus session. (fyi, you no one can do more than 3-4 hours of deep work a day).

Remember, a block a day keeps the drowning at bay!

One Insightful Question

Stop unconsciously floating through life & start thinking about things that really matter.

There is a person in my life that I cannot trust. He is impulsive, shortsighted, and selfish. He is always looking for the easy way out - saying “it’s too difficult, too complicated, or too much work”.

Who is that person? It’s Me!

Well, it’s half of “me”. I like to call him my Monkey Mind (MM). MM is responsible for all of my subconscious, impulsive, & irrational behavior. Instant gratification, social survival, & procrastination are classics of the MM.

Your Monkey Mind arose from evolution. Irrational fear may have saved your life from a lion 10,000 year ago. But nowadays, many of its traits are not helpful.

It can undermine the life you say you want to build:

You want a significant other but get cold feet approaching that attractive stranger at the bar.
You want 2 drinks & an early morning but fold & wake up at 11am with a hangover.
You want to quit your job or change your major but fear what your friends and family might think.

Not ideal. Granted, Your Monkey Mind is not bad for you all of the time. But, it shouldn’t be making decisions on the things that impact you the most (like work & relationships).

So, how do we get rid of it? Well, you can’t. But you can expose it by asking yourself just one question:

“How am I complicit in creating the conditions for the life I say I don’t want?”

By asking myself this question, I can quickly find where my Monkey Mind is making a mess.

For example, I say I don’t want a busy weekend. Yet, I accept every event invitation I receive. My MM wants to please everyone & never miss out.

Will this question immediately lead to the life you dreamed of? No.

But it will help you be more conscious of the life you are creating for yourself. And that is the first step into creating the life you actually want to live.

One Guiding Principle

Use principles to guide you towards a better life.

People love to fetishize entrepreneurs & leaders who achieve great success. As a result, they overwork themselves to achieve similar results. Phrases like “Going to be grinding all night”, “You can sleep when you’re dead”, and the WOAT “I’ll be happy when I get…” are common among ambitious young people. This is what we call “hustle porn”.

During my (Paul’s) investment banking “IB” days, hustle porn was the guiding philosophy. Sleeping 5 hours a night, ignoring family & friends, and obsessing over “the grind” were the norm! All at the cost of the individual’s health and wellbeing. Trading long-term pain for short-term gain:

Luckily, I’ve left the echo chamber of IB behind. Post departure, I realized many of my professional idols didn’t overwork themselves. Instead, they left a trail of consistent performance - improving at their craft each year.

How were they doing this? What was the secret? Had they won the genetic lottery?

It turns out the magic was not in a potion or pill but a principle. Kaizen. Kaizen is a Japanese word meaning change for the better. It emphasizes that small, ongoing positive changes can reap significant improvement.

It is not one day of herculean effort but many days of small, directed effort that generates outlier results.

In our work life, let’s recognize that it takes many swings of the axe to topple the oak. When the project seems too large, remember Kaizen. Make one small positive step on your project today.

Content Everyone Should Learn From

A curated list of content to help you explore your curiosity (effectively).

Learn to start making decisions for yourself *ALL TIME RESOURCE*
The way we think about charity is dead wrong, learn why **here.**
Luke made this guide to help anyone learn about crypto in 15 minutes.
Better your life by living in your zone of genius (shorter video here).
Understand how to deal with the future like Howard Marks (GOAT Investor).

Meme of the Week

See you next Sunday. Remember, it’s sacrilegious to eat protein or fats on Sundays!

- Paul & Luke

Help all the homies eat

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